==> Avispa: Make an announcement

[apiarycryptonaut]

--apiaryCryptonaut [AC] started memo stop it stop it stop it stop it--

You open the memo with determination. There are a lot of things wrong and you have a few you want to address. It has to be you.

Um, everyone, your 4ttention!
Ple4se, I think, yes?
Just um, re4d this!
You need to re4d... this, it's import4nt, yes!

Um so, Zur4he, yes!
You 4ll need to... know something, you do!
Remember um, qu4dr4nts, yes?
They're very very very... very import4nt to h4ve!
4nd you don't w4nt... to lose them, no.

Zur4he lost her qu4dr4nts.
More th4n one, too.

Think 4bout how she... feels bec4use of th4t!
She doesn't need to... be more 4lone, no!
Th4t's not how we... win this g4me, no!
4ll of you, stop!

You pause, staring at the memo before you send it. That's what you wanted to say! A certain other memo with talk of losing a quadrant had made you aware of just how important this was. And now everyone would know.

Comments

[soundtricks]

weiiiiiiiirdo

[apiarycryptonaut]

Yes, ex4ctly th4t, Zur4he!
Oh 4nd um, w4it.
If I'm "weirdo", um... wh4t 4bout you, Zur4he?
C4n I c4ll you... something else too, m4ybe?

[soundtricks]

uh
I guess♫
if you want to♫
whatever

[apiarycryptonaut]

Ok4y, yes, I will!
So um, I think... then um, this, th4t... um, it's, well, hm!
M4ybe r4sc4- no, not... 4 good n4me, no.
Or, oh, w4it um... m4ybe jer- no, no... no, 4lso very no!
This is h4rd to... decide m4ybe, I think.
Or um, v4g4- no... no no no, um.
There h4s to be...
...oh, um, R4r4, m4ybe?

[soundtricks]

I
that










no, you
that's
I gotta go

-- blackoutEtude [BE] has signed off --

[chroniker]

Oh, maybe a basic summary at first!
And if I don't get something, I can always ask more questions about it. 8)

[apiarycryptonaut]

Ok4y, um, b4sic summ4ry!
There 4re four, um... "qu4dr4nts" th4t trolls h4ve!
4nd um I don't... think hum4ns h4ve those.
Th4t's why you're confused... I think, m4ybe, um.
My lusus never re4lly... t4ught me, but I... think I le4rned, yes!
So um, oh, qu4dr4nts.
One of them is... um, m4tespritship, I think!
4nd it's for trolls... who re4lly re4lly re4lly... re4lly like e4ch other!
4nd um, then, Moir4illegi4nce... is the next one!
It's for trolls who... um, support, or um... no um, it's, th4t's...
They um, like e4ch... other but not in... the s4me w4y 4s... m4tesprits do, I think.
Or um, th4t's, um.
I'm going to try... expl4ining the other two.
Third is um, Auspisticism!
4nd um, it's, 4ctu4lly... 4 little confusing, yes.
It's three trolls, yes!
But um, one is... um solving, m4ybe, the... other two, or, um.
Something like th4t, m4ybe!
Then the l4st one!
The l4st one is... Kismessitude, I think, m4ybe.
It's um, when two... trolls, um, re4lly re4lly... re4lly re4lly don't like... e4chother 4t 4ll, um.
But it's, then, um... they, oh, I think...
They, this, um, w4it...
... ... ... ...

You actually take a moment to pull out some notes from your honeycomb modus. They are REALLY STICKY but you can still read them.

Oh um, ok4y it's:
"Equally shared non-platonic hate between two trolls"
Th4t's wh4t it s4ys!
... ... ... ...
I think I expl4ined... 4 bit of e4ch... m4ybe, I think, um.
But yes um, 4sk... questions m4ybe, if you... w4nt to, yes, um!
It's 4ll 4ctu4lly re4lly... re4lly re4lly re4lly confusing.
The first time you... le4rn it, th4t is.

[celestialcavalier]

A human tv show that focuses on the loud and violent airing of grievances between loud and violent people.
It's only a matter of time before someone grabs a chair and starts bludgeoning someone else.

[apiarycryptonaut]

... ... ... ...
Ple4se don't bludgeon me... with 4 ch4ir, Donov4n.

[artful_transgressor]

lots of facts are secrets
are you kidding me with this
and eVen more facts may not be secrets
but theyre still not things you announce in goddamn public to eVerybody
like if zurahe got so pissed at you for this that she slammed you against a wall and hatepailed with you
thatd be a fact
but somehow i dont think youd be plastering it oVer a memo for eVeryone
this is cause of things called personal discretion and priVacy
which im starting to wonder if you eVen grasp the concepts of

ugh
dont throw a party oVer this or anything
its just that id neVer get anything done if i hated eVeryone i argue with
fuck id haVe way too much on my nutrition plateau if i hated a QUARTER of the people i argue with

[artful_transgressor]

i dunno how either
but all things considered
seems like theres too many of em
and the odds of their being picked for this game way too fucking slim
for it to just be coincidence theyre here now
so it might be worth giVing em the benefit of the doubt
like get their asses in gear if thats what you think they need
but dont giVe up on em
or write em off based on how they are right now cause thats subject to change

what
no
that wasnt what i was fucking saying at all damn
eVen im not that much of an asshole
what i meant was that you can take care of yourself
with or without them
or at least thats what youre insisting
so if you help them out and they all fail and die or something
youll still be fine either way
so youVe got nothing to lose by working with them cause either way you can handle whateVer gets thrown at you
and frankly
i think eVen if they were an actiVe handicap youd still say you could take it
so i say why dont you

thats honestly eVen more reason to work with people
if youre openly admitting you need them to do shit for you to get anywhere
more and more it seems like you fucking off isnt just a thing that was neVer actually gonna happen
but like a thing that literally could not happen if you wanted it to

implying they arent already flipping all oVer the place with their neuroses
we are team batshit neurotic crazytown
iVe pretty much established this
like im not eVen entirely clear who is in which session exactly right yet but i can safely call this right now
still if youre suggesting they could be WORSE than they are right now
belieVe me ill send you a basket of fruit or something

honestly though
i kinda get the feeling that youre wasting your time giVing them kicks in the asses yourself
i think the games gonna nudge shit along on its own
probably more effectiVely than we could
it threw meteors at us just to get us into the game
and eVeryone here stepped up to the plate when that happened
im personally hoping theres no more meteors but
the games clearly got its ways of getting people to knuckle the fuck down and moVe their shit along
if you wanna try to speed up the process knock yourself out
but dont spin your wheels too hard if youre not getting anywhere

[apiarycryptonaut]

You stare at one word in that reply. One word that has you utterly baffled, and honestly you can't seem to get many words out at all. "hatepailed"

W4it th4t's wh4t, I
But, Lyn, th4t's, I
Th4t's, no, um, wh4t
I, this, but, why
... ... ... ...
How is th4t, but
I don't, wh4t, th4t's
Th4t isn't 4t 4ll
4ny, but, this, it's

You're going to step away from your husktop for a little while. You can't fathom why Lyn would say that at all. It makes no sense.

[artful_transgressor]

wow
i think i broke her

You're not sure what you think about this. You should probably feel bad, but mostly you feel mildly amused.

[apiarycryptonaut]

It takes her, easily, about an hour before she properly responds again.

I'm not broken, no.

[artful_transgressor]

aVispa
you literally lost the ability to string words together
you broke like a cheap watch right there
that said good job fixing yourself up
you wanna explain what the hell happened there

[apiarycryptonaut]

I 4bsolutely didn't, no.
But, um, e4rlier, um.
Why would you s4y... something like th4t, Lyn?
Th4t h4d nothing to... do with wh4t we... were t4lking 4bout, no!

[artful_transgressor]

it was an example
of facts you wouldnt make public regardless of whether or not theyre true
cause there are good reasons that those facts arent anyone elses business
did you eVen get the message at all or was your pan too busy shutting down

[apiarycryptonaut]

But these weren't f4cts... th4t should be priv4te!
4nd 4ctu4lly th4t, um... h4tep4iling shouldn't be priv4te... either 4t 4ll, no!
Bec4use, um, wh4t if... others w4nt to h4tep4il... them too, I think?
If it's priv4te, how... would 4nyone know not... to try, m4ybe, um!
If it's public, then... everyone knows th4t qu4dr4nt... is 4lre4dy t4ken, yes!
Secrets 4re b4d, yes!

[artful_transgressor]

oh my god
someone in this session
and by someone i mean anyone but me
needs to make schoolfeeding you their full time job
cause this shit is bananas
these are super simple concepts and youre acting like theyre complex puzzles that need solVing
rather than flat statements of fact you should just fucking parse into your pan

lets try this again
FROM THE TOP
cause god fucking dammit i refuse to belieVe you cannot be taught
first of all
what facts about someone else should or should not be priVate
is determined by THEM
not by YOU
if it was zurahe saying 'i approVe these facts for public consumption' then i would haVe no issue with that
cause its her business
and how much of it she does or doesnt want public is also her business
but YOU
a third party
do not get to decide FOR HER
what other people should be told ABOUT HER
in fact
you dont get to decide that for ANYONE
except yourself
you know what is actually your business
and can be shared in whateVer manner you deem appropriate?
YOUR OWN BUSINESS
as in things directly related to and affecting you
do whateVer you like with that shit
but when it comes to other people and their business
you need THEIR PERMISSION to share things about them with other people

and do you know whats gonna happen if you dont seem to care about peoples priVacy aVispa
if you just share eVerything you know about eVeryone WITH eVeryone regardless of whether or not people want you to
people are just gonna cut you out of the loop
no ones gonna tell you shit cause they wont be able to trust you with it
so for your own fucking sake
LEARN DISCRETION
cause the other option inVolves no one trusting you with anything discrete

also
re hatepails
you know thats a completely dumb argument youre making there right
like
you could say 'zurahe and i are kismeses now'
which would preclude any unwelcome quadrant adVances in that respect without oVersharing shit about whether and how youVe filled any pails whatsoeVer
i mean people would figure youre filling hatepails as a direct result of the quadrant
but thats not the same as announcing it
that shit should stay in the respite block
dear sweet galloping god how the fuck do you not haVe ANY nuances of social interaction down
i haVe literally neVer met or talked to another troll face to face in my LIFE and iVe got a better handle on this shit

[apiarycryptonaut]

You stare at Lyn's reply, and stare more, and probably stare at it for four increments of four minutes each before you respond. You think you've figured out exactly what Lyn is suggesting, and it's really helpful!

So I just h4ve... to m4ke everything into... my business, I think!
Then it's ok4y for... me to sh4re, y4y!
Th4t's 4n e4sy solution!
Th4nk you, Lyn, y4y!
Th4t's very very very... very helpful, it is!

I'll be in the... loop where everyone c4n... trust me, y4y, yes!

You're so certain that he's being helpful that you're sure to remember his great suggestion. This is wonderful!

[artful_transgressor]

i
what
NO
you cant make other peoples business your business
that isnt how it WORKS
there is no process by which you can eVer be giVen carte fucking blanche to share whateVer the fuck you want to about eVeryone else
THAT IS NOT A THING THAT CAN HAPPEN
like for instance
after this conVersation i am pretty much neVer eVer telling you anything priVate about myself
eVer
so this harebrained scheme is already off the rails

also
the key factor
in eVeryone trusting you
is that you DONT spew their personal shit eVerywhere like a broken sewage pipe
so what the hell would your plan eVen inVolVe
like
would you learn eVeryones secrets and then expose them to the entire fucking session
cause honestly
that goes beyond innocent ignorance
thats practically superVillain treachery territory
like
thats meaner than anything id do at my most pissed
and youVe seen how mean i get when im pissed
do you want to actually do something WORSE than that
i dont think you do
so nip this idea RIGHT in the goddamn bud cause its fucking terrible in eVery respect

besides
eVen if you didnt giVe a shit about being a supreme asshole
and thought that somehow sharing all these secrets with eVeryone was SO CRITICAL that youd take that moral bullet for the team
great
you spill eVeryones secrets for them
now what
now no one trusts you again
and they neVer will
and eVen if youd learned eVeryones secrets up to that point
theyre gonna haVe more critical information down the line
which theyll neVer share with you again
so the 'solution' doesnt eVen SOLVE anything
its just an elaborate dick moVe with no real payoff for anyone

the ACTUAL solution here aVispa
is to just
fucking
ask people
whats okay for you to make public knowledge about them
its so fucking simple
i am literally handing it to you
HOW ARE YOU NOT GETTING IT

You really should have walked away a few replies ago, back when you'd initially resolved to. But - ironically, given that you yourself aspire to be a huge internet troll - you are incredibly juicy trollbait, and you can never walk away from an argument.

You aren't sure how the conversation got to this point, but you're probably going to have some sort of pan hemorrhage any minute.

[apiarycryptonaut]

This time, you have a reply particularly quickly! Unfortunately, almost everything that Lyn said went in one of your ears and out the other. Except for one thing.

Oh, so, um, 4sking!
Bec4use this is still... this convers4tion, I think!
Wh4t c4n I m4ke... public knowledge 4bout you?
I'm 4sking, yes, Lyn!

[artful_transgressor]

NOTHING
EVER
FULL STOP

--AT ceased responding to memo.--

You nope right the fuck out of there, in an entirely dignified manner.

[bizango]

You ponder answering why you might apologizing... but it's too complicated and you'd rather forget about the whole situation anyway so you brush right on past it. The other stuff is more important anyway.

thank yOu~
and i'm glad yOu maybe tried~but~
yOu shOuld try tO nOt dO this tO~
anyOne~
ahaha~
nOt just me~

[apiarycryptonaut]

You stare for several moments, wondering, trying to figure out where you went wrong. You still haven't been able to figure that out. This... is puzzling in a very bad way.

I, um, then, this...
... ... ... ...
I'll try not to.
I don't underst4nd, but.
I c4n try to... not do th4t, um.
... ... ... ....