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[S] Zurahe: Freak The Fuck Out

-- CURRENT blackoutEtude [BE] RIGHT NOW opened memo WHAT THE FUCK♫♪. --

Your name is ZURAHE CADENS, and once again you've chosen to make a VIDEO MEMO rather than a TEXT one. However, taking into account the situation at hand, you feel as if you are HIGHLY JUSTIFIED in doing so. After all, it's not every day a CHUNK OF OCEAN replaces a part of the planet you'd been headed toward, and remains, to your relief, more or less SELF-CONTAINED. You're not sure what you'd do if it started flooding- you hate deep water and just about everything having to do with it. It's a lucky thing for you that the water doesn't seem to be going anywhere. YET.

You're not sure whether you're more ENRAGEDd or TERRIFIED by this phenomenon, so naturally you choose to display the latter, expression twisting into a snarl. You turn on and pan the camera of one of your spare computers around, and make sure the mic to your A.V.E.S. is turned off before you actually 'speak'.

So. Who wants to fucking tell me. Just what the actual fresh fuckin' HELL I'm looking at here?

Because from what I can tell, it looks like there's a fuckload of ocean sitting in the middle of my goddamn planet and it ain't supposed to be-- Princess, I'm lookin' at you.

Now. Can someone tell me how to get all this bulgesucking water off my PLANET?!

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yeah, sure
whatever, I guess

Ok4y, then I will!
I 4bsolutely will, yes!

you'll probably have better luck than me

I'll 4lchemize things for... you too, Zur4he, yes!
I will, I promise!
You'll like them, yes!

what really♫
but why♫

Is th4t surprising, to... do, m4ybe, I think?
I don't think it's... th4t surprising, re4lly, no.
But, wh4t do you... me4n "why", Zur4he, um?
It's obvious why, yes!

it's not obvious to me
otherwise I wouldn't be asking, would I♫

Oh, oh um, ok4y... th4t m4kes sense, m4ybe!
4nd oh, um, expl4ining!
Bec4use um, wouldn't it... be str4nge if I... didn't 4t 4ll, um?
You've helped me 4... lot Zur4he, yes, 4bsolutely!
So I w4nt to... help you too, yes!
Th4t's the simple 4nswer!

...yeah
you're definitely weird

but do what you want, I guess

Weird 4nd going to... 4lchemize you things, yes!
It's simple, I think!
I get to help... you too, soon, yes!
Um, I c4n pick... on my own but.
Is there 4nything th4t... I should try first?
Something especi4lly import4nt, m4ybe?

not that I can think of really
you already made weapons, right♫

Oh, yes, I did!
I m4de we4pons, yes!
Did you w4nt some... of the we4pons m4ybe?
Or um, I c4n... 4lchemize 4 puzzle for... you to use on... others, m4ybe, I think?
You wouldn't h4ve to... solve it, no, um!
But 4nyone you shoot... with it would h4ve... to solve it, yes!

nah, I'm good on weapons at the moment
maybe later, if I get too lazy to just punch shit
or less lazy♫
honestly, not sure which applies at the moment

and god no
I am shit at puzzles
and with my luck I'd wind up shooting myself with it somehow

Oh, um, ok4y, um.
I c4n try to... think of something, then!
I'll think c4refully, 4bsolutely!

4nd oh oh oh... oh, but if th4t... h4ppened then, um, I... could help you, yes!
I could help you... get out of it!
But um, no one... would be 4ble to... get you in there.
So you would be... re4lly s4fe, yes, 4bsolutely!

you do that
in the meantime, I'll be earning more grist, I guess
can't make anything without it

nah, maybe later
or if I get a chance to work on my puzzle skills

Oh, yes ex4ctly, yes!
I'm s4ving up ur4nium... grist, 4ctu4lly, I 4m!
I need 4 lot... of it, yes, 4bsolutely!
Soon, m4ybe, I'll h4ve... enough to use, yes!

Oh, um, ok4y, Zur4he!
I c4n help you... with puzzles 4ny time... though, 4bsolutely, I c4n!
4ny time, re4lly, yes!

uranium grist♫
do I even want to know why you need ~that~ stuff♫

right
I'll keep that in mind then
just in case any pop up

Oh, bec4use it's r4re!
4nd becu4se I need... it to 4lchemize up... 4 "CH4IN SKULL", yes!
I'm sure it's ex4ctly... wh4t I need, 4bsolutely!
To help me, yes!

4nd y4y, ok4y, good!

well no duh it's rare
it's also dangerous as fuck
could probably nuke a hivestem with a piece of that stuff

chain skull♫
what the fuck is a
no, you know what
I don't even actually want to know

Oh, yes, m4ybe, yup!
But th4t's why I'm... very c4reful with it!
I h4ndle it s4fely!

Oh, um, well, it's...
You'll see it, somed4y!

maybe
but look, I've gotta get going
game's not gonna win itself, yeah♫

Oh, um, ok4y, Zur4he!
Good luck, 4bsolutely, yes!

yeah thanks
later

-- blackoutEtude [BE] is offline --

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