==> Lyndis: Be productive.

[artful_transgressor]

Well, it took awhile, but once you stopped FLIPPING BULGES and distracting yourself from your WEIRD TIME SHIT with a lot of GRIST GRINDING and ALCHEMIZING WAY TOO MUCH STUFF, you finally started actually BEING PRODUCTIVE. The grinding allowed you to GAIN SOME LEVELS, which as far as you can tell is just a DUMB NICKNAME SYSTEM that gives you periodic infusions of BOONDOLLARS, but you assume it will be useful at some point. (What kind of game doesn't require you to get ALL THE LEVELS? But REAL LIFE doesn't have ABILITIES measured in NUMERIC STATISTICS that are increased upon LEVEL UP, so you're not actually sure how this is helping you.) More to the point, YOUR SERVER PLAYER has had enough grist to build up your CLIFF to the FIRST GATE - which was EASIER THAN IT MIGHT HAVE BEEN, since, you know, cliffs tend to be NATURALLY HIGH TO START WITH.

You went through it A LITTLE WHILE AGO, which accomplished NOTHING OF PARTICULAR IMPORTANCE except getting you kind of LOST. It's just as well there are plenty of CAVES on your planet, and also that you ALWAYS CAPTCHALOGUE YOUR EVERYDAY ESSENTIALS before you go anywhere; you haven't left ANYTHING back at your CAVE except, well, MEMORIES OF A SENTIMENTAL NATURE you would NEVER ADMIT to having. You're pretty sure you can ACTUALLY SEE THE FIRST GATE way off in the distance whenever you are AT THE TOP OF ANOTHER CLIFF, since there is A HUGE AND EASILY VISIBLE STRUCTURE leading up to it; part of you wants to head RIGHT BACK THERE, but as of yet you HAVEN'T GIVEN INTO THE TEMPTATION. You swore you were going to PROGRESS in this game, dammit, you can't just go RUNNING HOME LIKE A HIVESICK WIGGLER.

That, and you CAN'T ACTUALLY SEE IT ANYMORE, thanks to a bunch of FUCKING INEXPLICABLE STATIC that seems to be LOCALIZED TO YOU; no matter where you go, your FIELD OF VISION seems to cut off into A BUNCH OF SHITTY STATIC WHITE NOISE about THIRTY FEET AWAY in every direction. It is SO FUCKING ANNOYING and it honestly makes wandering around KIND OF IMPOSSIBLE AND DANGEROUS.

You are currently holed up in ANOTHER CAVE; it beats FRYING under your planet's godforsaken SUN(the light of which is COMPLETELY UNAFFECTED BY THE STATIC, dammit). It isn't as fierce as the sun on ALTERNIA, at least in that it doesn't CAUSE YOU ACTUAL BODILY HARM to be out in it, but it's still FUCKING UNPLEASANT. No wonder your quest involves BRINGING SOME GODDAMN SHADE in ways you are still COMPLETELY UNCLEAR ON. From what you've gathered, you're supposed to DO SOMETHING ABOUT THE SUN ITSELF - but that's COMPLETELY RIDICULOUS. How the fuck could you do something like that?

But you're getting DISTRACTED. You've got a PURPOSE right now, as much because you're not sure HOW TO DO ANYTHING ABOUT YOUR PLANET QUEST and whether or not you should be working toward your SECOND GATE or STAYING PUT to meet up with other players as because THIS IS IMPORTANT SHIT THAT SHOULD HAVE BEEN NAILED DOWN A LONG TIME AGO.

To that end, you OPEN A MEMO.

-- artfulTransgressor [AT] RIGHT NOW opened memo on board so done with playing blind. --

AT: alright so
AT: dunno how many of you actually open your sponge clots when cs is talking
AT: i wouldnt really blame you if you just sort of let that shit wash oVer you without bothering to process any of it
AT: but belieVe it or not he actually had something important to say about sequences a memo or two back
AT: specifically that all our planets may be connected through our gates
AT: probably just through our own indiVidual sessions but honestly who the fuck knows at this point
AT: but he also said that despite working out there is a sequence
AT: he has no fucking idea what the sequence is
AT: or eVen who is in what session
AT: and you know who else doesnt know
AT: me
AT: i kinda wonder if ANYBODY fucking knows
AT: this memo is to remedy that shit right now
AT: so
AT: lets get this shit sorted out
AT: i want you
AT: no matter who the fuck you are eVen if weVe neVer talked
AT: or eVen if you cannot fucking stand me
AT: put your hands down kids
AT: to sound off here
AT: i want you to giVe your name
AT: along with who your serVer and client players are
AT: i dont care if your serVer and client haVe already spoken up by the way
AT: you damn well sound off anyway
AT: this is as much to get people straight as sequences
AT: and it gets eVeryone checking in
AT: if we get eVeryone to do this then we should be able to figure out the sequences
AT: along with how many sessions weVe got here
AT: and once weVe got the sequences and sessions straight maybe we can come up with some kinda plan
AT: ill eVen set up a format
AT: its gonna be serVer - you - client
AT: so in my case kaprao - lyn - zirreh
AT: as far as i know the three of us are all part of the original session phaest started
AT: were gonna call that the alpha session for claritys sake
AT: i know theres another troll session that sorta squeezed in
AT: well call that beta
AT: and so on down the line if theres more i honestly dont know at this point
AT: theres a human session as well i know that much
AT: theyre just gonna be the human session
AT: if theres more than one of their sessions too i guess well figure out names
AT: but does eVeryone get the idea of what were trying to figure out here
AT: good
AT: now sound off

Comments

[apiarycryptonaut]

This seems like 4... re4lly re4lly re4lly re4lly... good ide4, I think!
So um, yes, hello!
I'm 4visp4, yes, Lyn!
4nd um, Hirune is... my client, I think.
Then Duri4n is my... server, yes, 4bsolutely, y4y!
I think this w4y... you'll solve this puzzle!
You c4n do it!

[artful_transgressor]

you call eVerything a puzzle
but this is the first time i can recall where it was actually a sort of apt usage of the word
since we haVe to piece this shit together
but yeah
go hassle hirune and durian then
get them to respond too
if its like a puzzle
then we need all the pieces right
so get as many people to respond as you can

[apiarycryptonaut]

Oh, um, ok4y, Lyn!
I c4n try to... do th4t, I think.
I'll 4lso 4sk the... victory squ4dron too, yes!
I'll let them 4ll... know they should respond!
We'll solve this puzzle... re4lly quickly, we will!

[flowerwhisperer]

urm
mine wou|d be Hirune - Kaprao - |yn

[artful_transgressor]

sweet
some things are starting to link up already
so sequence wise
weVe got durian > aVispa > hirune > kaprao > lyn > zirreh
right?
not bad for only two people haVing chimed in so far

[polygraphing]

woah look at you being al bozzy and zhit
but i mean whatever ill bite
bharal iz my klient and
zurahe iz my zerver
zo bharal - mandya - zurahe
hapy now

[artful_transgressor]

happier than i was yes
okay so yeah pretty sure you guys are all in the beta session
like i knew about zurahe since shes the one who used to yell about phaests trying to keep your session out of the game and how she was such a bitch for it
so if youre connected to her then im guessing youre all part of that session
youre the only one iVe got from there so far so the beta sequence is still mostly a big blank

[polygraphing]

wel
i know that nikal got bharal in
and i think zurahe got komezh in
prety zure thatz everyone in our chain
uzed to be more but
zhit hapenz

[twintimes]

spArks - rIA (+IrA) - chrysI
..but spArks Is deAd now so I don't know If I got AssIgned A new server plAyer
And I don't know who thAt would be eIther
humAn sessIon over here by the by

[artful_transgressor]

yeah i know youre human
so this being the start of the human sequence chain is pretty obVious

sucks about your serVer
i guess maybe his serVer player would be yours now?
just sort of skipping oVer him in the sequence
like if i died
kappy would probably end up as zirrehs new serVer

[defensivealchemist]

phylu5 >- durian >- avi5pa
if you a5ked for anything el5e i didnt 5ee it
5o how did a 5econd tro11 5e55ion ever happen
did anyone explain that in one of the5e wa115 of text

[artful_transgressor]

i dont know exactly how
i just know that it inVolVed hax to some degree
and that it might be why the games been so weird and glitchy for eVeryone

how the fuck the humans wound up getting roped in is anyones guess
unless there was hax from their side as well?

[callouslystalwart]

Seeing you take such a charge is... ~~CS
...Interesting. ~~CS

And ill-suiting, you'd like to add, but you don't.

~My~ client is Phylus, and ~my~ server is... ~~CS
...Pherae. ~~CS

[artful_transgressor]

the hell do you mean by significant pause interesting

anyway
iVe been fucking encouraging teamwork and productiVity eVer since i stopped alchemizing shit and started paying attention to the game as a whole
i just haVent been making a ton of memos about it
mostly iVe been adding to memos weVe already got
of course since weVe got a fucking aValanche of memos its entirely possible you missed it

alright so
putting together what iVe got here
for the humans iVe got sparks > ria/ira? > chrysi
not much to go on there but who fucking knows how much the humans are paying attention
for beta weVe got nikkal > komesh > zurahe > mandya > bharal > nikkal
which if mandyas right means weVe got their whole chain
didnt realize beta was such a fucking small session
and alpha sequence so far is pherae > apparently youre perrix > phylus > durian > aVispa > hirune > kaprao > lyn > zirreh
you know theres a reason i asked for names right

[soundtricks]

You're not sure if you're more annoyed by the fact that he's acting like he's in charge, or like he's acting like he's the first one to try and get a sense of order going.

You'll settle for both, but you'll still answer, if only because you figure it can't hurt anything.

gotta work on that conciseness jerkoff


server: Komesh
client: Mandya

used to be Eighis, but I guess when he bit it I took over for him or something
also protip: you could have just asked
I ~know~ who I'm supposed to playing with
I just don't like it

[artful_transgressor]

well lemme see
first of all
this is Very blatantly me asking
which i assume eVen you recognize since you answered
although despite the fact that youre claiming you know you haVent actually told me eVeryone whos on which team so maybe its not that obVious after all

second of all
maybe you know eVeryone in YOUR session
but i wanna find out exactly whos in each session not just yours
so unless you literally know eVeryone and which session theyre in you couldnt tell me by yourself eVerything i wanna know
plus this is as much about the sequences as the actual players which i dont see you claiming to know at all
so this memo would still be necessary regardless

third
i wouldnt actually be expecting people to keep important information to themselVes rather than spreading it around
so it made more sense for me to assume nobody knew than to think that maybe one or two people know and just arent sharing with the class

anyway
conciseness is oVerrated
whereas clarity is underValued
i wanna make sure eVeryone knows what im asking for and why its fucking important we know
doesnt hurt that theres also way too much text for them not to see it
of course with all that STILL hardly anyones chiming in

[mapmaking]

Ugh this guy. After an encouraging speech by Avispa, you finally respond. But only because he's actually asking for information.

my formaTIon Is--x
perrIx - phylus - durIan--x
also jusT so you know my branchkInd Is workIng ouT greaT so--x
fuck your pasT self I made IT work and Im acTually noT enTIrely afraId of kIllIng ThIngs now--x!!

So maybe you couldn't cut your ire out ENTIRELY. Well, you tried!

[artful_transgressor]

are you legitimately still pissed off that i suggested there might be a better weapon than branches out there
like i piss people off for a lot of reasons
sometimes intentionally
but this is the dumbest thing anyones eVer been mad at me for bar none
especially since you were flipping bulges panicking about how you were gonna die at the time so trying to find you a better method of self defense was me actiVely trying to help you
i was so concerned with the question of keeping you alive that i failed to recognize the deep-seated flushed feelings between you and your branch
if you seriously wanna keep holding a grudge oVer that then go the fuck ahead i guess

/slides in here all late-like

[ataraxicarcher]

dunno if you've talked to em yet of if you even know who they are but i know in my session i'm the server for Eric and my server is Lily so

Eric - Shea - Lily

far as i know neither of them have croaked yet /prettysureimbonedifLilydoes

[artful_transgressor]

uh
check the format
its supposed to be serVer - you - client
so if your serVers lily and your clients eric
it should be lily - shea - eric

also i think i talked to eric like
fucking foreVer ago?
like before we were eVen in the game
lily iVe yelled at more recently
when she almost killed herself
i dont think i actually knew who she was before that though

also you wouldnt be completely fucked if your serVer died
its happened to plenty of people already apparently
the chain just drops to the next link
so lilys serVer would become your serVer
which isnt to say its a good thing that youd want to happen but at least its not an instant death sentence for you

/slides in here even later

[tetchytmesis]

On the one hand, you agree with everything this troll is saying. On the other hand, you don't really like their tone. You roll your eyes and answer anyway because this dish is more important than your petty issues with the tone of someone's FONT.

human. obviously.
chirho. wess. lily.
but. chirhos. dead. so. now. its.
chrysi. wess. lily.
and. i. think. shea. got. her. ordering. wrong.

[artful_transgressor]

wow that only looks like the the most robotic typing quirk eVer
honestly i didnt realize typing quirks were a human cultural thing too
especially giVen the way some of you react to ours
but whateVer i guess its totally off the main point

also yeah i kinda gathered she fucked that one up
i wouldVe worked it out from context eVentually i think but since she flat out stated who was her serVer and who was her client in text
it was kinda already obVious she fell flat on her face with the format
but at least im not the only one keeping an eye on this shit trying to make sure its accurate

[appleful]

sponge clot
what's that
WHY DO YOU OPEN TAMPONS

You're too distraced by this mystery that you forget to read the rest of the actual memo.

[artful_transgressor]

uh
what the fuck eVen is a tampon
and do i actually want to know this answer
please tell me its the human equiValent for how trolls hear shit
cause if it isnt then im kinda worried what you thought i was saying

let's pretend this isn't a billion years too late

[starstorm]

hihi wynwyn ^w^/
ummmmmm bhabha got niknik in and niknik got komkom in
niknik went in fiwst dough
winwin was supposed to get niknik in but den winwin died so bhabha got hew in instead
and niknik was supposed to get zakzak in but den zakzak died so niknik got komkom in instead
weehhhhh niknik needs to stop finking about dead fwiends